Movie Reviews Plus

Superman returns: Movie length special: Smallville

2006-06-30T14:57:00.000+10:00

We entered the cinema as per usual and after an altercation with our seating. Where the usher actually did his job for once and ushered someone to their seat. It was unfortunate however that it was on the basis that she was a young attractive girl with crutches (hard to run away from his pimply little face). I knew neither I nor Tim will recieve such attention until our blogg picks up and we can secure the cash advances for Tim's breast implants and my pubis to chest hair transfer. So please tell your friends and family.
The movie commenced with a lot of noise. People talking everywhere. I did not mind (please read past reviews) as I have a thick skin for that kind of thing. Ironically Tim was a little ruffled.
The movie itself sucked. The characters were paper-machete, the plot incredibly predictable. But most irritating of all was superman himself. He was the biggest poser I had ever seen. In between throwing asteroids into space and catching the falling women he often found time to gleam himself obnoxiously. I am quite sure he was an underwear model prior to this “film”.
A friend once described watching Australian movies as a two hour episodes of “blue healers” or “water rats” (both B-grade australian drama TV series). Due to the limited use of themes and closed pool of actors.
I have never felt this so strongly as with this film, I felt I was watching the TV series Small Ville. Designed for teenagers, a kind of Dawson’s Creek where Dawson can lift cars and save people in between battling the blues of adolescence.

I give it one star.

From this point on I am discussing the film as if you are not going to watch it. So please don’t read on if you are. (Additionally, children should not read on… there is some discussion of ‘reproduction’.)
There were a few particular themes in the movies which interest me. One was Superman’s relationship with Lois. Sure he loves her. But he is superman, he could have anyone…. Or everyone… and “faster than a bullet”, even with out them knowing! (As Tim so rightly suggested)
She hasn’t waited for him, he pines for her. Mistake. That’s not super, that’s pathetic.
So my first point is the fallibility of Superman’s “Love”…
This extends further when we realize that Lois Lane actually gave birth to Superman’s love child and has now tricked her current boyfriend (who seems like a pretty descent guy) into believing it’s his. Personally I think this makes Lois quite the villain herself. Superman doesn’t mind, he loves her!
The fallibility of Superman’s “Love” extends further when we realize that Superman’s kid has his powers and superman implies that he will be training up the boy to help him on his mission….. :
Alright Superman lets do some quick math. You have come back from a mission to look for the remains of your people and planet. You were disappointed you return home to find the “love of your life” (note great cynicism) is banging some other bloke, all the time knowing it could be your kid. You then realize that your amazing power to save the human race has been passed off to your sporn.
Now, I believe it is not only your duty but, in your best interest, to reproduce with as many different women as possible. Every woman seems to want you. There will be no losers.
You owe it to the human race to make more heroes, and to yourself to reproduce more of your own kind so you don’t feel so lonely.

That is why I have decided to put together a little movie of my own:
“Superman saves planet earth: Doggy style”

Superman will be played by myself, and I am currently casting for women between 19 and 35, one from each and every continent of our beautiful planet.

Tim's Movie Review: Superman Returns

2006-06-30T11:30:00.000+10:00

I have no comments to make about unusual food or bad marketing in food retail this time around. We ate Mum's home cooked bolognaise and if there is one thing you don't do it is criticise your Mum's cooking; just kidding Mum, it was delicious!

Nick and I had a minor drama as the movie was starting. Greater Union have recently introduced allocated seating in an attempt to get people to pre-book their tickets. The seats that we were allocated were located towards the back and off to the left of the cinema. I, somewhat naively, suggested to Nick that this was where we should sit. Nick just gave me an odd look and preceded to make himself comfortable in the centre section of the cinema towards the back. Just as the lights went off a gangly teenage Gestapo member (acting as an usher) demanded to see our tickets. As you can imagine Nick's previous bravado quickly disappeared and we meekly moved to our proper seats after the CineNazi had moved other people from our allocated seats. Shortly after this a young women on crutches hobbled down the stairs to assume her allocated seat which we had been sitting on. I have been brought up to be a positive person and would like to think that we were doing this unfortunate young lass a service by keeping her seat warm.

As the opening movie credits started up I was less than impressed by the musical score. I guess with all the money spent on special effects the producers could not afford original music and were forced to plagiarise the musical score from Star Wars. The opening music set a low benchmark for the rest of the film as Superman Returns contained very little of anything in the way of original material.

The film is set in the United States and starts when Superman returns to Earth after being away for over five years. Superman is pitted against arch-villain Lex Luthor, played by the very funny Kevin Spacey and must, naturally, save the world again. Of more interest to me was his relationship with Lois Lane. Superman and Lane clearly have feelings for each other, however there is the minor obstacle of Lane being married with a child.

Unfortunately the interest created by this love triangle is not sustained as the movie takes the easy way out. Without spoiling the movie let's just say that Superman's powers extend way beyond x-ray vision and super-human strength. Indeed one could make an argument for Superman having special powers in less than orthodox areas.

The cinematography of the film was impressive and the special effects of this genre have come a long way in the last 20 years. Inevitably though, there are only so many times you can watch Superman couteracting the forces of gravity and stopping a large object from crashing into the ground at speed before this little trick becomes passe.

Brandon Routh, the new Superman, was not able to bring enough charisma and likeability into this role to sustain my interest for the two and half hours that this movie ran (or crawled) for. Most of Routh's acting experience comes from the small screen and I feel confident in recommending him to stick with the Gilmore Girls.

The villain was much more interesting and by the hour and half mark I found myself hoping that lex would just put Superman out of his misery so that we would not be forced to endure any more of this pretentious drivel again. When is Hollywood going to learn that a good movie needs more than a multi-million dollar budget and to be memorable the narrative needs to go beyond the standard trite story ripped off from a two-bit comic book?

Moving rating: 5 out of 10

Tim's Movie Review: Mission Impossible 3

2006-06-15T19:24:00.000+10:00

The last couple of movies that we have seen have been my choice. While nothing has been directly said I feel that Nick and the resident mediator (Cousin James) hold me personally accountable if they feel the movie is not up to their somewhat dubious standards. Therefore I let Nick choose this movie and washed my hands of the consequences of Tom's 'performance'.

We had a change of venue this time around and went to Hornsby Westfields. Oporto was my meal of choice while Nick had some sort of tofu health sludge that had the texture of sour milk and looked like it might contain some sort of 'natural' herbs and spices.

The movie was pretty much as I expected. There were plenty of explosions and other ludicrously expensive stunts that I am sure could have solved the debt problems for most North African countries. The money that went into creating the explosions that is; not the explosions themselves. The problem is that I have become spoilt and these stunts no longer seem as cutting edge as they might have ten or even five years ago.

To be honest I don't remember much from the first two Mission Impossible movies. They are pretty generic by nature and you know Tom is going to save the day even before you pay for your popcorn and coke combo and get comfy in your chair. What made this film a bit more memorable was the character development. J.J. Abrams was the director of this film and he is known for his television work in Lost and Alias. Cruise's character, Ethan, gets married and of course his wife is taken as a hostage by the evil villain. The fact that we see Ethan's wife taken at the beginning of the film and then the film backtracks to before they are married does add suspense to an otherwise fairly predictable plot.

The film does have its share of unintended laugh aloud moments. The scene where Ethan marries his girlfriend in an impromptu civil ceremony in a hospital (where his fiance works as a doctor) certainly classifies as one of these. I can see how some people might think the ten cent rings they give each other were cute; I found it vomit inducing. The part where they consummated their marriage amongst the medical equipment in a backroom of the hospital was also pretty pathetic. Did these kids think of the consequences of playing amongst medical waste? I don't think it would have been a great start to their marriage if Tom contracted HIV/AIDS from a knocked over medical waste bin during his little tryst.

Overall this was as enjoyable film, if not a very challenging one. If you're after a couple of hours of bang for your buck then this film might just be your shtick.

Movie Rating: 7 out of 10

Mission impossible 3 - Keeping Toms Face wrinkle free

2006-06-15T11:42:00.000+10:00

On the whole the movie was a well developed explosive thriller with alot to offer those easily entertained by great gizmos, exploding things, and beautiful women.
The movie starts with a rather extensive character development, Tom Cruise ("Botox") our star Ethan Hunt, is now trying to convince himself and the world that he can settle into the homely married life with a beautiful young nurse. While by night he is still torn by his other secret life of tunneling and blowing things up, a secret from her. Is this a reflection of Botox's real life?
After this long drawn out picket white fence fantasy, that would make oprah winfrey and the cast her relationship special vomit their own organs and claw out their retina's, the tunneling and blowing begins. And it is good. Lots of suspence. Lots of surprises, and lots of twists and turns. Overall it is an enjoyable flick and I give it 3 NICKS.

The new world: an epic journey into debilitating haemorrhoids

2006-05-17T16:42:00.000+10:00

So what does it mean to you when you have heard the same soundtrack, same dialogue same ruddy faces over and over again for three gruelling hours?

Not much I tell you.

I would normally recommend an interval with free coffee for this sort of long winded artyfarty crap, this time some top grade amphetamines would just keep the eyes from closing.

I always find it interesting to see how people use the entertainment media as a chance to express and teach us all some higher lesson which can only really be encapsulated by having the experience ourselves. I believe the creators of this movie had that in mind:

“If we make this movie so long and boring as to make them believe they have spent a whole lifetime in the hardship of colonial America then maybe our audience will garnish the wisdom lost in the precious innocence of the American Indians..”

And they were right, it took me and a large team of mental health professionals to shake a traumatic lifetime spent in a cinema seat in Chatswood Westfield.

Don’t get me wrong it was a good movie, I just felt with that much time spent I should have signed a contract or been paid.

I give it 2 stars

I think next time we will be evaluating something a little more explosive…. (See next review Xmen 3)

On a lighter note, Tim was well behaved. “Seen and not heard”, just like I have always tried to instil in him.

There were a few restless souls however (most likely troubled by the fact they had been lured into this enduring commitment) who I did have to politely shoosh once or twice.

Tim's Movie Review: The New World

2006-05-08T20:45:00.000+10:00

Nick and I met this past Sunday to do our monthly film review. We were joined by Cousin James who I believe was there to mediate any disputes that might arise. We decided to avoid the notorious Mandarin Centre food court this time around and tried our luck at the more traditional food court in Westfield shopping centre. Nick bravely ate some two dollar slices of pizza that were most probably three dollar slices on Saturday and four dollar slices on Friday. Much to our relief Nick survived the pizza. Nothing else to note about the food court except to say that one particular shop had a peculiar marketing strategy. If you were to buy nine baked and stuffed potatoes they would give you one free. Seems that there are a lot of obese people in Chatswood or perhaps this store has overestimated the appeal of their potatoes.

As we settled down to watch the movie I was feeling very self-conscious. Nick had made a number of references to my consumption of popcorn during movies and my general inability to remain quiet during a film. How was I going to relax and enjoy this film with Nick analysing my every sigh, cough and movement? Luckily I was saved by several people around us who felt it necessary to comment above a whisper during the film. It was with great satisfaction (and relief) that I looked on as Nick (now to be known as CinemaCop) shushed these people and restored order to our cinema.

This movie is definitely the hardest movie that I have had to review. It is a rarity in that it is directed by Terrence Malick. Malick has only directed five films since 1969 and his 1998 film The Thin Red Line is my all time favourite film. The Thin Red Line is a film that many people regard as pretentious and long-winded. I can see where these people are coming from however I regard it as a masterpiece. In The Thin red Line we are transported to this world of war that goes far beyond the usual thin veneer of lazy stereotypes and into the world of the individuals who have to live with the spiritual, emotional and physical consequences of being in the war zone.

I was not able to relate as easily to The New World as much as much as The Thin Red Line. The New World had moments of brilliance where I really just drank it up. The problem was that these moments were not enough to sustain the film for its some two and a half hours. The film starts off in a standard enough fashion. The English settlers make a base near the Naturals (as the Native Americans are referred to in this film) where things inevitably go awry and bloodshed ensures.

Captain John Smith (played by Colin Farrell) is sent out on a mission and is subsequently captured by the tribe. He is only spared execution by the pleas of the chiefs daughter Pocahontas (played by Q'Orianka Kilcher) who begs that her father grant him mercy. Without giving too much away it is from this point that the film's main themes are explored. The choices and consequences that John Smith and Pocahontas make have ramifications for many people and these are explored in much detail throughout the film.

The main problem with the exploration of the relationship was that Colin Farrell was not effective enough in conveying his moods, thoughts and ambitions in a non-verbal way. Q'Orianka Kilcher (picture above) was excellent in her role and the audience were really able to see where she was coming from.

While I really enjoyed this film I feel that it was a little too self-indulgent and could have been cut down by about twenty minutes. A young couple behind us walked out after about an hour. This was the same couple that Nick told off at the beginning. Was there a correlation between these two events? One of my measurements of a good film is that it keeps you thinking for days after it has finished. This film certainly qualifies in that department as I have been mulling it over in my head ever since it ended. I would not recommend this film for everyone but if you have the patience then this film will reward you.

Like a hearty porridge this film doesn't always make the taste buds water but it will digest in your gut for a long time afterwards and give you a satisfied feeling to last the day.

Movie Rating: 7.5 out of 10.

The Big Banana

2006-04-30T18:37:00.000+10:00

My family and I returned yesterday from a week away in Coffs Harbour. Coffs is located about 500 kilometres north of Sydney and takes a little over 6 hours to drive to; no mean feat with a 10 month old baby. We had a very relaxing time during which I was able to visit a 'piece' of nostalgia from my youth and was metaphorically stabbed in the back by my co-author Nick, however more on that later.

When I was growing up my family used to cram all our luggage and other associated paraphernalia in one of the original Toyota Toragos. Now I am sure you have been in or at least seen one of these 'people movers' (as they are known in today's marketing jargon). Pretty plush right? Well I consider our family pioneers in the automotive industry as we road tested one of these originals that make travelling in today's Toyota Torago the first class experience it is today. Back in the eighties our beast was viewed as quite a novelty with its sunroof and moonroof. Despite spending countless hours in the turquoise king of the road I never quite got a handle on the difference between the function of a sunroof compared to a moonroof.

Anyhow back to the present. My cousin Julia joined my family and I on our expedition to the Big Banana. We were surprised to learn that the Big Banana was just one of many Big Things. Now I have heard of other 'Big Things' such as the Big Pineapple but was not aware that across Australia there are nearly 150 of these 'Big' monstrosities. You would think that your average tourist would be smarter than to be drawn in by a big blob of concrete vaguely replicating an orange or potato. You would be wrong. The Big Banana is obviously big business. They have everything one could conceive of including: a tacky gift shop where you could buy banana water pistols amongst other banana related useless items, a cafe selling frozen bananas (more on this later) and various other non-banana related attractions.

You may have noticed that this blog is entitled 'Movie Reviews Plus'. The reason for this is that Nick and I would like to leave this blog open to reviews on non-movie related things. The Big Banana draws marks for endurance and innovation. You have to be doing something right to last 40 years. The people running the Big Banana are innovative in the amount of ways that have found to get your hard earned into their coffers. How a tobogan ride and lolly shop relates to bananas is something I have yet to decipher; and selling some banana flavoured lollies does not count. In my opinion you should not claim to have a 'Big Thing' unless that object can be seen from space ( or at least from a passenger jet). Therefore my list of 'Big Things' does not extend past the Great Wall of China.

What saved the Big Banana from total ridicule, however, were their delicious frozen choc-coated bananas. It is at this point that I would like to say a big thanks to Cousin James for introducing me to Arrested Development. I don't want to speak too much about this fantastic show as it deserves its own review, except to say that it is the best and funniest comedy I have ever seen. In Arrested Development the Bluth family run a Frozen Banana Stand and of course sell frozen bananas. I took great pleasure in consuming one of these delicacies at the Big Banana cafe. I imagined myself as Michael, the brother who keeps the family together while the rest of the family plot and scheme to take over the company.

While we are on the subject of plotting I would like to take this opportunity to respond to some of Nick's slanderous claims from his last blog entry. It should be noted that Nick waited until I was out of town to write his cowardly diatribe in what was very thinly disguised as a movie review. His actual review can be summed up in a few words: 'What Tim said'. Prior to seeing Inside Man with Nick I did not believe the claims that men had menstrual cycles. Well my friends after that evening with Nick I am convinced of the validity of male periods. In regards to the claim that I had advice for Nick on a few topics, allow me to focus on one. I consider it my duty to inform someone of the correct way to handle their weapon in Zombie House when they can't seem to find the target 2 feet in front of them. Nick there are no points given for style in this game; perhaps it is just a different genre to the C grade Hong Kong Kung Fu games you are used to.

To close I would like to thank everyone who has read our blog so far. We would really like to see some more discussion on our blog posts so please leave a comment . You can do so my clicking on the 'comments' link at the bottom of this blog post. Don't be shy and remember the primary purpose of this blog is to entertain.

Inside Man... better than Scary Movie 4

2006-04-26T10:54:00.000+10:00

As Tim and I approached another forced social interaction, it was clear that one of us was having strong regrets about our new levels of responsibility as movie reviewers and that the other (Tim) had become overly embellished in his role as a person with "professional" opinions about just about everything. Comments were made from anything to do with the marketing skills of Asian food outlets to correct fitness training techniques and the role of nutrition. Both of these especially the later were cause for frustration on my part as Tim has never volunteered to eat a piece of fruit in his life. Yet somehow, I held my tongue. A stoic Viking warrior, A bezerker just waiting for the nod.
The barrage continued as we played a couple rounds of zombie house at time zone and Tim was correcting my shooting style. I mean really: You never tell another man how to use his 'shooter'. NEVER.

And so we sit down to what would be a surprisingly intelligent and entertaining film. I agree with all that was said in Tim's review. The cast was fantastic.
I must note however, that there were a number of specific tools used by Spike Lee to make the audience uncomfortable in their 'normalcy'. There was a feeling that it was a little formulated. But I don't see any other way to do what he did. And I like it. Most of the lead actresses and iconic 'babes' of the film were African American. The 'good guys' were also African American and most of the baddies were white. The fact that I have noticed this and even Tim has found it to be a bit outlandish is the intention of Mr Lee. The fact that we find this scenario unusual, unrealistic and formulated forces us to see in ourselves the socioeconomic normalcy which is actually an unjust system. A very noble use of media.
Other utilisations of this tool were Jodie Foster’s character that played one of the most intelligent and powerful woman I have ever seen in a screenplay. Any glass ceiling in her world was smashed years ago and the glass shards used to slit the carotid arteries of anything in her way. Impressive.
And finally the blatant display of racism against the "Muslim"... who was actually Sikh. It is very obvious, because it is so obvious in the media and the television news every night for the past four years and still everyone is ok with it. The very fact that he is mistaken for a Muslim shows the total lack of understanding, or even want to understand, of modern western society.
I cannot help but admire the strong social messages in this movie. There are more than this however, which I refrain from mentioning so as not to ruin the plot for future viewers. But his central theme is social justice and where the hell is it?
Additionally it made an extremely entertaining film. With twists and turns that left you "on the edge of your seat". Character interaction was dynamic and believable. I give it 4 stars.

On the topic of social justice however:
It was late into the movie and my faithful companion had just finished noisily eating his popcorn and coke and had managed to refrain from loudly commenting on special effects or what he thought was going to happen next for over five minutes. When a lovely young woman (quite attractive I might add) returned from the candy bar and began to open her Maltesers. Much to my absolute surprise, being a man who has learnt to grow through pain, as my co reviewer is often a boom box of complicated and strange noises... Tim was outraged! And said audibly (she was about 5 seats away): "Oh come on, don't you think she could keep that down!"
And like a Dragon rising from the a long and patient hibernation I struck: "I don't mind your noise Tim, I don't mind the old couple that had the movie destroyed by your lude comments at a History of Violence (That’s right I am sorry if you guys a reading) but the hypocrisy. It’s too much!"
And in theme of the movie: Social justice had been re-established.

Tim was struck at once and I could see in his beady little eyes that he was already compiling a review on my behaviour.

Tim's Movie Review: Inside Man

2006-04-17T15:13:00.000+10:00

Well true to our word Nick and I met up for our second monthly movie review. I had to persuade Nick that there were better movies available for us to review than Scary Movie 4 and Nick eventually agreed that Inside Man might be a more stimulating choice. You can check out other reviews of this movie from At the Movies and IMDB. If you click on the very first link below the title of this review you can see a trailer of Inside Man.

Before we saw the movie we enjoyed some very tasty Asian food in the Mandarin Centre (Chatswood, Sydney). Or I should say I enjoyed some terrific food while it looked to me that Nick was eating boiled Chihuahua marinated in chili sauce. However he assured me it was delicious. My advice to the people at the Mandarin Centre is to consider carefully the idea of updating your photos of the food you have for sale. Most of the photos and signage that we saw looked like it was from the early nineteen-eighties and had starting turning sepia brown. Anyhow I digress.

Inside Man has a lot going for it even before you enter the cinema. It boasts an impressive cast including Denzel Washington and Jodie Foster. The film also comes highly recommended from the vast majority of professional reviewers. My experience with A History of Violence taught me one thing though: Don't rely too much on professional movie reviewers.

This film was on the surface a standard Heist/Hostage movie. The first part of the movie showed the "perps" (as the NY cops called the hostage takers) execute a seemingly flawless robbery. The filming of this section of the movie is extremely well done and the tension is communicated to the viewer effectively.

What separates this movie from other Hostage genre movies is that apart from this short action sequence at the beginning there is not a lot of action throughout the film. Instead the director, Spike Lee, maintains the tension in terms of the mind games that Clive Owen's character plays with Denzel Washington's character.

This movie had an original plot that appeared believable to me. The interactions between The Detective/Hostage Negotiator (played by Washington) and the main Bank Robber (played by Owen) were also tense and dramatic. The camera work was very edgy and interesting. I don't want to give too much away except to say that this movie had a number of twists which I for one did not see coming. The film lures you into thinking that you have guessed the main twist and then delivers a swift one-two and an uppercut for good measure.

My only real gripe with this movie was the overuse of racial stereotypes. I will leave it to Nick to comment on the black beauties in the film. What annoyed me was Spike Lee's very random use of his characters to make social comments on American society's racial issues. The points that were made about the treatment of racial minorities (in particular Muslims) were mostly accurate to a certain extent; however they were inappropriate and forced. They simply did not blend in well with this kind of movie.

Overall this was a very good movie that transcends the usual trash that these action/hostage type movies tend to be.

Movie Rating: 8 out of 10

A History of cut and paste recipe movies

2006-03-27T11:43:00.000+11:00

This overly-manufactured midday movie left me with a strange sense of frustration. And not just because of the long and over played sex scenes. I mean really, if the movie needed that much sex for character development. Then surely it should have had lead roles as bored house wife and a pizza delivery boy. Don’t get me wrong sex is great. Its just the movie somehow tastelessly displays it, as if it is part of an old reliable recipe to make box office money. Two parts sex, three parts violence and one part acting/plot and character development.
The frustration I felt however was driven by the vomit worthy corniness of these happy country living folk. Scenes where the whole family gets up to give the four year old daughter a hug at 2am after she has had a nightmare. I mean really! The child will be emotionally retarded with that sort of over-pampering. Where is Dr Phil when you need him?
The movie then careens off into a stark opposite, with baddies with scars and blood and guts flying off into the audience. As our big boy star (viggo), brings back a healthy dose of his stone faced warrior acting, we know and love from lord of the rings.
Tim however suggested that this was the clever development of juxtaposition. After checking the dictionary for what that meant, I decided that it may well be but they could have tried a little thing called subtlety.

With all this "juxtaposition" and paper-Mache issues about sex, violence, parenting and intimacy versus reality (a central theme being: how well do you really know someone?), I found myself wanting to create a future of violence towards the movie creators and of course my noisy popcorn eating compatriot (Tim). Who continues to this day to revel in the “juxtaposition” the movie held and his ability to be the noisiest eater in movie recorded history.

I give it 3 out of 10 (anything below 4 is “I want my money back, and re-imbursement for the time lost that I could have been poking my eye out an AIDS infected pencil.)

Tim's Movie Review: A History of Violence

2006-03-26T22:30:00.000+11:00

I had high hopes before Nick and I saw this film. Before my wife Sally gave birth to our daughter Isabelle Sal and I would see a movie every two or three weeks at least. Isabelle is 9 months old now and my cinema quota has gone down considerably.

The title of the film is somewhat misleading. It gives the impression of the film being a documentary. Believe me this film is anything but a doco.

I suggest you read some film reviews about this movie from such places as At The Movies and Rotten Tomatoes. You will discover that most of these reviewers rate this movie very highly.

Let me say that Nick and I thought this movie was overrated in a big way.

On the positive side the fight scenes in the movie were pretty cool. I hate movies that show people getting shot and dying a nice clean death. I imagine that in real life it is very rarely like that. I appreciate that people in this film tended to die in a slow and agonising way.

On the negative side I thought the plot was overblown and contrived. The main character was supposed to have gone from evil Mafia badass to country bumpkin in a short period of time. Not believable.

The main character Tom, played by Vigo Mortensen showed no expression throughout the entire movie. Whether he was serving coffee or blowing someone's head apart he had gave the impression of being on a high dose of Prozac.

Now I understand the themes that this film was attempting to communicate. Society is fascinated by sex and violence, can we really know someone?, what is fantasy and what is reality?

The problem for me was that there was no subtlety in the film. The main themes were driven home in a such a clumsy way that the audience did not have to think at all. The film was not sure what it was trying to be. Was it an action/suspense flick, a comedy, a drama?

I'm calling this film for what it is. An overrated dose of pretentious garbage.

Movie Rating: 5 out of 10